


Karma Slave

by holdouttrout



Category: Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-31
Updated: 2007-12-31
Packaged: 2017-11-15 21:27:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/531894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdouttrout/pseuds/holdouttrout
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A very AU fic involving reincarnation, Han, and a Leia who remembers everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Karma Slave

_Karma Slave_  
I'm a slave of Karma   
Spin the Wheel and I'm a king reborn   
I'm a slave to Karma   
I'm coming back, yeah, I'll be coming back   
But for the last time.   
  
Short author's note: This is not a happy fic. It's a dark, funny, macabre crack!fic with a depressing ending. Some people may not find it funny in the first place. And it does have a little bit of language in it. Also, the full text of the lyrics to the song is available [here](http://www.anysonglyrics.com/lyrics/s/splashdown/karma.htm)  

The eighth time Leia reincarnated, she met Han in a restaurant.   
  
He was wearing a suit and tie, and Leia (whose name was Patricia at the time), thought he looked uncomfortable and out of place.   
  
She walked right up to him. "Damn it all to hell--why can't I ever seem to get rid of you?"   
  
Han turned to her, a surprised look on his face. "Do I know you?"   
  
She jabbed a finger into his stomach and he stepped back in shock. "Yes, you know me. I don't know what your name is, but you just won't leave me alone! And I've got these stupid  _abilities_  that I'm blaming on you--" she punctuated her words with another jab--"because out of everything in my crazy-ass existence, you're the only constant! The only one!"   
  
Now Han was backing away from her. Leia pulled out a gun, causing everyone in the restaurant to gasp and moved away from them. "What's your name this time? Last time it was...William, and the time before that it was Andrew. I'm getting fucking tired of pretending I don't know you, sleeping with you, falling in love with you because it's the same damn story every time! It wouldn't be so bad except that I remember things."   
  
She took a menacing step forward, brandished the gun in Han's face. She got a sly smile on her face. "I remember it all." She tapped the gun to her own forehead. "I've got it all up here. Every crazy minute from the first time I saw you out there--" she waved the gun up in the air, toward the ceiling--"to this very moment. And you know what? I was actually *glad* for the first few times. Hell, I even enjoyed myself the last time, and that was the time you constantly forgot our anniversary and took off every weekend to play golf!"   
  
Han was sweating now, large drops rolling down his temples.   
  
Leia leaned really close. "But this is it. The end of the line. I'm not going to play this game anymore. Something went wrong, buddy, and I'm not paying for the mistake. No more soul mates, meeting in the next life. I'm done, and I know how to stop it, too."   
  
She cocked the gun. "I've been waiting for this moment a long time, Han-Nilu-Soresh-Dom-George-Theodore-Andrew-William-Whatever. I figure, I kill you, I don't get stuck with you next time."   
  
A shout rang out, and Leia jerked her head around to look. Han took the opportunity and knocked the gun out of her hands and shoved her back, knocking her to the floor. He pinned her there, the room still in shocked silence.   
  
A hoarse cry tore itself from Leia's throat.   
  
"Hey, lady," Han said softly, "It's okay. We'll get you help."   
  
Leia struggled against Han's hands, but got nowhere against his firm grip. She saw her gun, several feet from her.   
  
She looked straight into Han's face. Her expression of rage faded into something infinitely more complex.   
  
"I just want this day to end already," she said sadly.   
  
And the gun was in her hand and her hands were free.   
  
She raised the gun and pulled the trigger.


End file.
